You know, the most recent one that nearly lasted a month, not the one that was waaaaaaaaaaaay longer. What has been happening these recent weeks?
For starters, I was in the process of evicting my roommate. I definitely felt like Elle Woods, and though I know I could have crucified him in a courtroom (both on an understanding of operations and material side), we settled. He's an asshole. But I don't need to continually fret about that. I don't have to be friends with my roommate, but I refuse to be their mom. There is a level of expectation for maintaining responsibility of one's personal funding and the shared apartment unit. That proved to be a lost cause for both of these areas with him. And court was a time for me to be humane and kind in my kicking his rear to the curb. Just because you know you're right doesn't mean you have to wipe their face with it if you can settle it. However, he did call me a child in the courtroom, so I'm not going to be holding his hand whatsoever in this process. Boy needs to google more. And I am well off enough that I can live on my own. I liked saving the money and putting it towards debt, but I'll be ok.
There are a couple of other things I'm still concerned a bit about, but I have a plan B and C in play, and I'm at a more comfortable point with those things. Maybe my superhero name would be Contingency. Not Contingency Girl, just Contingency - the one who thinks about plans B and C. It's a nicer lens of viewing anxiety preparation.
I can tell when my mood drops. It's kind of interesting, and takes a lot of effort to bring it back up. On March 26th, I noticed and recorded to be cautious. I was noticing all the signs for it to be a slower time, and I needed to make sure that I was taking time to keep myself going. I knew. I knew I was slipping and about to have a melancholy time. However, I handled it. I shut some things off, and my work and behaviors didn't suffer. I did it. I survived it with more experience, and I can handle it again when it comes back. When; not if. And I'm getting back to proper me - I was noticing this as I was clearing drafts and compiling thoughts.
I got this.